Cooley's Rap

"Cooley's Rap"

Music & Lyrics by Scott Cooley.

I like hard rock, and old-school rap

Eminem's a clown and kid rock's a hack

I like the Beastie Boys and Run DMC

Sugar Hill Gang's ahh-ighte wit me

I can ad lib cuz I'm all that, uh huh

Imperromptu jammin', off the top of my head

I'm the best rapper that isn't dead

I remember way back in the day, when I was just a little man

I had a red rubber hippity hop, went hoppin' round the basement land

Just bouncin' around back and forth up and down and side to side

Holdin' on to the handle in my own little world, felt like I could fly

I was fly alright, and definitely fresh

Not to mention def and dope, word

When my sister wanted to use it, I stone cold said nope

I went hip to the hop, hop to the hip, I was hip to the hoppity most

And I don't stop, but I'll drop you like your hot

I'm conceded, like to brag and boast

Fully strapped, packin' the heat

Slayin' sucka squirrels that I never did eat, say what?

Yo-yo, Duncan Imperial, purple

Walkin' the dog, around the world in circles

Representin' GB, southside of Flint

Grew up in da hills and I'll give you a hint

Bling bling, had it goin' on, done my time, now I'm an ex-con, oh no

Wore Timberlands, Fila, and K-Swiss too

Before anybody from the hood even knew

I'm from the street, Plantation Drive

Didn't have no slaves, didn't talk no jive

Scratchin' records on my turntable, I didn't sweat the technic

Slam dunkin' off the neighbors backboard

Never had to leave my feet, sweet

Cold hoopin' it, out in the driveway, just a b-boy tryin' to score

Goin' to the junior high dances at night

Break dancin' out on the floor

Then the dj would cool it down, I slow danced with all the fine cuties

When the teachers weren't lookin, I was gettin' some tongue

An grabbin' me some bootys

Gittin' jiggy, don't know why

All I can say is I musta been high, whoa

When I wasn't chillin', I was bustin' a rhyme

Either that or perpetratin' a crime

I only smoke chronic, drink Tanqueray and tonic

Keepin' it on the down low

Dort highway cruise, holla at a ho

Homeboys in the Nova, posse in effect

Drove that car till it was totally wrecked, my bad

Pimp my ride, I think not, didn't need to be down wit no cops

They stole my stash, my bowl that's cashed, and cut down my crops

Givin' a shout out to my peeps, you best gimme my props

And if you don't show me no respect

I'll bust you up side your chops, believe it

Yeah boyeee, can I get a square

Why's that afro pick stuck in your hair

I'm down wit dat, I'm keepin' it real

When the man keeps you down, you gots ta steal

Just a thug, I'm gonna git you sucka

Never knew nobody said word to yo mutha

You be illin', you be trippin' too

Me and my adidas gonna crush your groove

You're wack, word to that, but I'm a playa and I'm PH phat

What up doe?, I'm tellin' you dog, snoop ain't got nothin' on me

It's on you, the onus that is, hi my name is Scotty C

Went downtown to get the nickel bags, I loved to smoke that cheeba

Kicked back with my remote control, watched MTV on my Toshiba

Copyright Β© β„— 2008 by Scott Cooley. All rights reserved.

writing and inspiration:

What can I say about this one? Hmmm....let's see. Well, somehow I thought it would be interesting to try to write and record a rap song. This is the only song where I used a fake drum loop and fake bass riff. Then I used the technique of scratching a bronze-wound acoustic guitar low E string with a heavy guitar pick to simulate record scratching with a turntable needle, which I thought sounded pretty cool. Then I wrote rhyming lyrics that included a lot of phrases I've heard rap fans using in their everyday language. I put just about everything I could think of to put in a rap song all in one song, so I'm not sure I'll take on trying another one anytime soon. Then I threw in the background vocals that accentuated certain lyrics, and some that added aside commentary.Β  The song is absolute nonsense.Β  I worried about it having a swear word or two, a drug reference or two, and was overall worried that it was less than authentic since I'm a white person with an upbringing that you might characterize as being far from that of a typical rapper.Β  This is one of my songs I'm somewhat embarassed about, but I can't quite put my finger on why exactly.Β  I also worried people might construe some of the lyrics as arguably containing stereotypes or being blaxploitational or something, but I could never quite decide why exactly anyone would think it was cultural appropriation, so I released it anyway.Β  I thought the Beastie Boys were pretty cool back in the day.Β  It's almost a parody of a rap song that ended up being a good rap song anyway, as if a caricature of itself or something along those lines.Β  The words plantation, slaves, and jive I wish I'd left out.Β  When I was a kid my family lived on a street called Plantation Drive, which I learned from movies like Roots that plantations were associated with slavery, and we had neighbors who had little "lawn jockey" statues of black people holding lanterns along their driveways but I instinctively thought something was wrong about that and was proud my family didn't have them, but also my parents stressed the importance of not speaking like black people do, calling it "jive," so despite thinking it was cool to use some of their colloquialisms I picked up from TV and music, I was also proud to speak proper English, which has served me well in writing. Β  That's what I was thinking at the time I guess, and I might've been a little high when I created this one, which may have clouded my judgement, but that's acceptable in the rap game, right?Β  Oh well, probably all artists have a few songs in their catalog they're not sure if they should've released or not, but it's out there now, and not much I can do about it except explain myself here.Β  It was an interesting and fun pursuit, and I'm glad I did it. The end result is fun to listen to. My friends' children and my niece and nephews seemed to like this one. It has a nursery rhyme quality to it I suppose, which might account for that attraction.

recording, mixing and mastering:

all by Scott Cooley, actually done at Scott Cooley Music Productions in downtown Flint, Michigan, home of many a great rapper.

personnel and instrumentation:

critical reception and cultural impact:

check out what they have to say about this one at:Β

more (here, let me google that for you):


further description and complete lyrics:

check out the full details on Rap Genius:

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